February 14, 2009
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Im starting this entry with a IM convo between me and Stephens, it fits into something that I have put long nights of meditation on to fight. There are times when my thoughts have gone to “well I haven’t heard/seen her so she’s cheating” or “why does he do all these things for her, he wants her”. What is eventually done in the dark will come to the light. If they are doing u wrong, deal with it. Harking on it hurts the trust. So what if u were always cheated on, so what if u don’t want to be hurt again.
The following takes place between 8:00 pm and 9:00 pm…
Grifter™: g evening
nicki stephens: whats so good about it
Grifter™:
nicki stephens: jeff being a dick
Grifter™: why u say that
nicki stephens: well he is
Grifter™: what happened
nicki stephens: its valentines day and he dont want to spend any time with me
Grifter™: what is he doing working
nicki stephens: no
Grifter™: or does he have the boys
nicki stephens: he has his boys
Grifter™: ok so whats the problem
nicki stephens: i suggested activities that involves the kids and he just gets hateful and informs me that he wants to stay home and spend time with boys
Grifter™: think about it
Grifter™: those boys mean everything to him
Grifter™: and there are gonna be times when he will just want to have them with him
Grifter™: male bonding more dads should do it
Grifter™: u should be proud not being so angry because u have a real fatherfigure
Grifter™: for a boyfriend
nicki stephens: when acts like one
Grifter™: see ur being unfair right now
Grifter™: u two have a very good relationship
nicki stephens: whatever
Grifter™: and he always makes time for u in the end dont he
nicki stephens: no
Grifter™: it just dont be when lil nicki wants it
Grifter™: spolied ass lol
nicki stephens: this is valentines day?
Grifter™: exactly not xmas not thanksgiving
nicki stephens: isnt it suppose to be special except he is being hateful instead of being sweet in which puts me in a bad mood
Grifter™: u have him in ur life dont u
Grifter™: there u go theres ur special right there
Grifter™: u HAVE someone
Grifter™: quit being petty
nicki stephens: that we really dont spend much time together
Grifter™: ur not married...yet
Grifter™: so instead of being this spolied person
nicki stephens: it looks like were arent going to
Grifter™: sure tell me anything
nicki stephens: i dont know why has been an ass lately
nicki stephens: i understand the other night
Grifter™: doesnt sound like it to me
Grifter™: just sound like u set those expectations high again
nicki stephens: it seems like when he is around his kids he is an ass
nicki stephens: or when he hears from nicole
Grifter™: its called responsibillities
Grifter™: and u sometimes dont get it
Grifter™: because u get tied up in what u want
nicki stephens: u know what after she gets an aboortion or loses the baby he can have her back it seems like he wants her bc he keeps talking about her and yet he gets mad when a guy texts me
Grifter™: u have to share girl
nicki stephens: sharing with the kids i dont mind at all its i dont think i have to share with her
Grifter™: she was his wife
Grifter™: u will always have to share with her
nicki stephens: i dont give a shit
Grifter™: and there lies the problem
nicki stephens: the kids yes but not her
Grifter™: everytime she is in the picture u get crazy
Grifter™: and there is no reason for it, jealousy make u look real silly u know
nicki stephens: u damn straight
nicki stephens: he gets mad each time shane asks me how im doing
(ok. Shane is the last d*ck she had…no pun, no homo)
Grifter™: do u blame him
nicki stephens: he has no right
nicki stephens: since she keeps butting into our life
Grifter™: what is shane to u
nicki stephens: nothing
nicki stephens: an ex just like nicole
Grifter™: not the same nicki
Grifter™: and u know it
nicki stephens: he informed me one day that if she didnt get knocked up he would still with her
nicki stephens: and in the shower the other day he was telling me that she was having baby issues that there was something wrong with it and advised her to abort it
nicki stephens: how am i suppose to feel about it
Grifter™: u should be happy about it and supportive
Grifter™: hes talking to u about his deepest thoughts and problems
nicki stephens: tell u what i will tell him to take her back and leave me be
Grifter™: here we go
Grifter™: time for me to be the bad guy
Grifter™: ready...
Grifter™: here goes...IS THIS WHY U HAVE SO MANY DAMN ISSUES IN RELATIONSHIPS NICKI STEPHENS??!!
nicki stephens: and he is going to think im fucking around on him when i go to summercamp
Grifter™: so
Grifter™: u think hes gonna leave u for his ex
nicki stephens: apparently he doesnt trust me
Grifter™: and apparently u dont trust him either
Grifter™: perfect two idiots lol
nicki stephens: i put to much time into this relationship to be hurt
Grifter™: so just enjoy the good time and keep goin
nicki stephens: even though he is thinking about nicole when he is with me?
nicki stephens: i deservev better
nicki stephens: than being compared to her
Grifter™: ur not being compared to her u are the one who is competing
Grifter™: so dont
Grifter™: either he is gonna be with u or not
Grifter™: ur making it into a game show
nicki stephens: no he is still interested in her and bringing it into our relationship
Grifter™: well leave him now then shit if u think that
Grifter™: because u are the only one thinking it
nicki stephens: he has no right to say shit to me about shane until he limits his time with her only about the babies
nicki stephens: i feel that he is comparing me to her even though i am better
Grifter™: well u got me fooled right now
nicki stephens: what makes u think that he isnt comparing/interested in her
Grifter™: u are telling me that a man who has a responsibility to provide for this woman and who has been with this woman
Grifter™: has kids with this woman has to prove to u that he is a man
Grifter™: u are stuck on stupid
nicki stephens: he dont have provide shit to her
Grifter™: yes he does
nicki stephens: just support the kids
Grifter™: its a defaut tie in there mom
(FYI. She is the mother of three boys, different fathers and none of them have contact. State/Federal foots the bill)
Grifter™: u should know this
nicki stephens: i will not have him thinking of her when we are together especially when we are in bed
Grifter™: u know that aint what he's doin
Grifter™: he talks to u about everything sounds like and u just have to rememeber that this is the mother of his kids and his ex
Grifter™: his biggest problem ever
nicki stephens: yeah his ex she needs to stay in the past and not moving into the future
Grifter™: she is his past present and future
Grifter™: and it seems like u need to rethink this
nicki stephens: then he can have her back
nicki stephens: im fuming to u
nicki stephens: bc we are both hot right now and nothing hurtful needs to be said
nicki stephens: everytime i turn around i hear something about her
Grifter™: ok so
Grifter™: she was his best friend
nicki stephens: a best friend and a wife would not fuck around while her soldier was in iraq
Grifter™: again the only reason he got the divorce was because SHE wanted it
nicki stephens: its like im in her constant shadow and it bugs the hell out of me
nicki stephens: i fix his meal and had a shower ready he got there and i hear about her while we are in the shower
nicki stephens: i was trying to make it romantic bc he was spending the weekend with his kids
Grifter™: will u come out of this fariy tale now
nicki stephens: i just wish he would reassure me that he dont her anymore
nicki stephens: like he use to
Grifter™: he came over, hes telling and conviding in u about her
Grifter™: he is with his boys and not at the strip club or bar
nicki stephens: i know
Grifter™: so quit thinking and reading into shit and enjoy ur man
Grifter™: u got a good one...for once
nicki stephens: i think im losing him bc he constantly worries that nicole will keep the kids from him so he thinks he needs to take her back
Grifter™: thats not what hes thinking
Grifter™: he knows he doesnt have to go back to nicole in a relationship
Grifter™: u gonna lose him because ur thinking that
We all do this, take Valentine’s Day to be a serious thing. My point is if u have someone support that someone. They are doing the best that they can, life isn’t a damn romance novel. Not the end of the world.
I’m in the US, my girl is in Europe/Germany. If we can have a “dramaless” relationship then like “Bama” whoever that little man in ur head is coming up with these thoughts needs to come together and make a change!
Now, In other news…
O called late one night this week. It seems that his nephew had his truck and one of the kids of his girl got sick. He asked if I would take him to go get some medicine. In the background she was saying all kinds of evil, I told him u tell her I got my shoes on and Im out the door on my way! Im not like his other boys if her calls me its because he needs someone to get it done! He was so happy to hear me say that.
Got the car, 1500 down after financing the 2005 Colbalt, note $ 220 dollars a month. I can pay that with my drill pay.
Spent the last two weeks filling out apps because the unit put every sort of dirty trick they could come up with to keep everyone in Arkansas. Even now as I speak there are guys struggling to peace back together their lives because all the promises they made about jobs with OWT and within the Brigade were false.
Endgame with OWT: Packets disappeared, letters of release turn from the commanders of the companies could to only The General of the Arkansas Guard could.
Endgame with AGR jobs in the state: Buddy system and who u know.
I talked with my fam about these issues seeing as I was trying to go to Mississippi and the certification with that would put me in Germany doing the “dream job” I’ve always sought after. Every plan I had was destroyed…
So after I get done with WLC even if I have to reclass to MP im leaving Arkansas. I’m even considering going around, through, and even behind the back of the chain to get somewhere where I can have some sort of secure future. Swords have been sharpened.
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